


A World So Full Of Beauty

by historymiss



Category: Dragon Age
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-10
Updated: 2012-02-10
Packaged: 2017-10-30 21:50:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 760
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/336539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/historymiss/pseuds/historymiss





	A World So Full Of Beauty

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Defira](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Defira/gifts).



"You want to know about love?" Anders leers, and Justice is sorry he asked. Leering was complicated to grasp, at first- it is like mocking but not quite, and there's that undercurrent of lewdness that always gives Justice trouble (double-entendres remain a mystery), but he believes that now he has heard it often enough to identify the tone when he hears it. Anders and Ohgren have helped quite a bit.

"It is a simple question." Justice replies, as stiffly as only a corpse can. 

They're sitting outside Vigil's Keep. The rest of the Grey Wardens are eating, and Justice has, for obvious reasons, been politely but firmly barred from the mess hall pretty much permanently. He only minds because his friends spend an inordinate amount of time there- or maybe that's simply how it seems when one is not allowed in a place and one's friends are.

He's not sure if it's an injustice, but it certainly feels a little like one.

"Are you soft on someone?" Anders asks, shifting on the bench- the mage happened to be passing by while Justice was waiting and dropped down beside him, loudly complaining about the standard issue Warden boots and how stiff and, worse, unfashionable they were.

Justice has yet to understand fashion. He doubts he ever will. It is not as if anything will make him look other than what he is, after all, and if he is honest (and Justice is always honest) he prefers that to be the case. He doesn’t remember how love came up, exactly, possibly I love Tevinter robes or I love kittens, or maybe even you love the Warden-Commander, right? Although that in particular is too much even for Anders.

"No." The reply comes quickly. Too quickly, in truth, in a way that reveals more than Justice intended. "I value all my companions, but I do not esteem anyone as highly as I believe you must for it to be love."

"Not necessarily." Anders mutters (there’s that double talk he’s so fond of, mumbling and mutterings so that one word means another), before raising his voice. "So what gets you going? Big piles of... lyrium?"

He cups his hands, moves them in a circular motion and waggles his eyebrows. It is astonishing that one man can move around so much while remaining seated- a talent Anders claims he developed in lessons in the Circle. Justice stares at him until he stops with a self-conscious cough.

"Look, Justice- love isn't about esteem or respect, not really- that comes later, if you're lucky." Anders tugs at his earring- sincerity does not come easily to him, and it shows, even to Justice. Living in the Circle develops habits of elusiveness and double-talk that can take a lifetime to break. Talking like this, Anders seems older, somehow, the façade cracking just a little so that the light can shine through. "It's about, um, beauty. Seeing it in someone else. Seeing something that makes them light up."

Justice stares, fascinated by the way Anders' face shifts as he talks. To have so many feelings, so readily on display: this dance of emotion and its quick and subtle masking will never cease to amaze him.

"They make you feel worthy. Or safe. Or inspired." Anders continues, oblivious. "Or horny."

The eyebrows waggle again. Justice ignores them. He is not entirely sure what horns have to do with love, and the way Anders is talking makes it sound like he doesn't want to know. Something along the lines of what Ohgren keeps quizzing him about, he is sure. There is that tone to it.

"I think that I begin to understand." Justice says slowly. "To see the beauty in a thing- in a person- is to love it."

He looks up, and sees the rain-washed stone of Vigil's Keep, overlaid as always by memories of Kristoff's that are no more than ghosts, now- a faint feeling of familiarity that lends the sight depth and savour. And beyond it, the wide world of mortals that's full of so much more light and colour and beauty than Justice ever imagined, worthy and special and yes, worth saving. Worth loving.

Anders picks at a loose scale on his tunic and shrugs. "That's one way of putting it."

(A year or so from now, Anders will open his eyes and gasp.

"This is how you see it? The world, I mean." His voice is ragged, sore. He’s been shouting, with a tongue not his own. “It’s beautiful.”

Deep inside him, Justice will stir like a nod.)


End file.
